You probably went to school for a long time. Some people went to school for a large percentage of their life.
Yet, not one person ever had a course on giving themselves approval or loving themselves, even if they’ve got several PhD’s.
Schools don’t teach how to approve or love.
They don’t even teach what love really is.
They don’t teach what it takes to be loving.
They don’t teach that you achieve happiness only through love.
There are two ways to respond to any situation in the world. One is to disapprove the heck out of it, and the other is to approve.
It is the same with everything. If we are not approving of ourselves it means that we are actually disapproving of ourselves. Duality is always present and when it is not one thing it must be its opposite that is running.
So the first necessary step before we start giving ourselves approval it so let go of disapproval energy.
Please follow along as you are reading, the actual experience (no matter how big or small) is necessary for complete understanding of how to give yourself approval.
Step 1. Let go of disapproval
Letting go of the disapproving is the necessary first step that you need to take prior to giving yourself approval.
Up to now, you haven’t been giving yourself approval because you subconsciously decided to disapprove of yourself.
Simply watch how many times a day your mind tells you to beat yourself up for even the smallest thing.
You can’t find a parking place, so you disapprove of yourself.
Your coffee gets cold, so you beat yourself up.
You’ve got a pimple on your face, you disapprove of yourself.
It happens a thousand times a day. Do you see it?
How does beating yourself up help you in any way? I’m sure you agree, it doesn’t.
However, we are convinced it actually helps us.
Here is what it really does for you: It gives you headaches, stomach aches, back aches and body aches.
That’s what beating yourself up does for you, at a bare minimum.
So the smart thing is to decide to stop doing it.
Could you let go of disapproving of yourself, right now, in this moment?
Go along with me.
Before you can love yourself, you have to let go of all that negative, disapproval energy. To make room for love you have to let go of the non-love.
So, could you let go of disapproving of yourself? Just a little bit, since it isn’t helping you.
And a little more. And some more.
Keep doing this until you feel you no longer disapprove of yourself (in this moment at least).
Step 2. Put your hand on your heart area
Now this step will just make it easier for you to move your focus from the mind (analytical part) into heart (feeling part).
Do you know the expression “home is where the heart is“?
It can be said that is one of the greater life truths, although a lot of people don’t even think of it in that way
Put your hand on your heart area and feel the warmth.
Fell the opening inside and feel the focus shifting towards feeling instead of thinking.
And when you feel you are ready, proceed with the next and final step.
Step 3. Decide to give yourself approval
This final step is simply a decision.
After you have decided to let go of disapproving (just in this moment) and you have your hand on your heart, simply decide to start approving of yourself.
If it is difficult for you, in the beginning try to change the word “approval” with “liking”.
So can you decide to like yourself just a bit in this moment right now?
Could you decide, just for this moment, to accept yourself exactly as you are? Just as an exercise.
Could you decide, just for a short time, to stop wanting to change anything about yourself?
Coud you decide, just for this moment, to go ahead and accept yourself? Would you be willing to like yourself just a little?
Could you now decide to give yourself some more approval? Just a little bit more.
And could you give yourself some more approval?
And a bit more.
And even a bit more.
Could you open even more inside and allow the love and approval to flow?
If you can feel the energy, or feel even a bit better, it means you have succeeded in giving yourself approval.
Congratulations on learning something that will help you for the rest of your life!
And that is all you need to do to give yourself approval. The rest is repeating it until it becomes a habit.
Try it and keep doing it for at least 10-15 minutes. And then for 30-45 minutes. And then for an hour.
See how far can you take it.
See how better you will feel afterwards. This is your direct proof of doing it right!
It is especially beneficial to do it in the evening right before sleep or just before getting up in the morning. You will have a good night of sleeping and a great day ahead of you.
Final thoughts
Remeber, life is what we decide about it. It was Gandhi who said:
“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”
You get to decide right now and from now to let go of disapproval any time you catch it and start giving yourself approval.
You can decide to be loving instead of resisting and hating.
The world and most of its 7 billion inhabitants are not happy, not healthy, not abundant and certainly not loving.
It doesn’t have to be true for you. Let go of disapproval and give yourself approval.
Give approval to those you have relationships with.
Give approval to your bank account.
Give approval to a part of your body that’s bothering you.
Try it and you will like it!
Love,
S.